


you're all around, you're underneath my skin

by bothsexuals



Category: Community (TV)
Genre: M/M, Pining, Pre-Relationship, it is once again about the YEARNING, so much pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-04
Updated: 2020-05-04
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:33:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24004405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bothsexuals/pseuds/bothsexuals
Summary: In the safety of their blanket fort, Troy lets his mind drift to places he usually wouldn't as he looks at a sleeping Abed.
Relationships: Troy Barnes/Abed Nadir
Comments: 26
Kudos: 249





	you're all around, you're underneath my skin

**Author's Note:**

  * For [beyondmythoughts](https://archiveofourown.org/users/beyondmythoughts/gifts).



> This fic is dedicated to ao3 user beyondmythoughts who left the sweetest, most heart-warming, serotonin-boosting comment on my last trobed fic. I hope this truckload of yearning brightens your day.
> 
> Everyone, please enjoy. I kinda made myself emotional with this one.
> 
> Title is from Rusty Clanton's "You're in my head".

Troy almost never woke up early. Truthfully, he slept in a lot more often than he would like to admit. Apparently, that morning was an exception. 

He woke to the first rays of sunshine streaming in through the window of Abed’s dorm, tingeing the small blanket fort they were sleeping in of a soft golden hue. His eyes still closed, he basked in the warmth for a moment and breathed in deeply, the familiar smell of Abed’s shampoo filling his lungs. 

As his eyelids fluttered open and the world came into focus, he felt an unusual weight on his stomach; he glanced down and saw Abed had at some point shuffled closer and thrown an arm around him. 

He turned his head sideways and his best friend’s face filled his vision, his lips curved in a dopey smile. Troy could see his eyes move beneath his shut eyelids, and wondered what he was dreaming of.

Quietly, so as not to disturb him, he turned on his side to face his best friend. 

His body seemed to be void of tension in his slumber, and he looked peaceful. He looked small, precious, like something Troy needed to cherish and protect, make sure no harm ever came to. 

Maybe that was just how he always felt about Abed, though. But while he was awake, he couldn’t throw his arms around him and protect him from the outside world, from the odd looks thrown his way, the mean jabs from people who didn’t understand him. 

Abed might have let him. He might have let Troy be his protector, his real life superhero, his shield from the ugliness of the world, the ugliness he didn’t deserve to be on the receiving end of. But Troy wouldn’t find out, not anytime soon. 

Because people don’t feel this way about their best friends. Or maybe they do, but they don’t also want to sweep them off their feet and kiss them under the rain like they were in one of those lame romance movies that Troy would never admit had made him sob. 

He wouldn’t find out, because whenever he got a little too close while he was awake, Abed gave him that curious look, that shy smile, and Troy’s heart felt like it was about to burst, and he moved away, frightened by the strength of that feeling. He pretended not to see the disappointed frown that took over Abed’s face for a split-second, and he pretended it didn’t tug at his heartstrings quite so painfully.

He wouldn’t find out, because if he gave into this feeling, if he opened his heart to Abed, he might lose him. 

He wouldn’t find out, because even if he didn’t lose Abed he might lose everyone else, he might lose his family, both biological and found. 

A small sigh escaped Abed’s lips, and Troy’s mind stopped wandering, instead focusing back on his sleeping friend. 

His hair had gotten a little longer, in fact he had been talking about needing a haircut. Troy liked it this way, loved the way the edges curled, giving him a less put-together look. He noticed a small strand had fallen out of place and felt a tingling in his fingertips, aching to reach out and tuck it back. 

He took a shaky breath and let that instinct take over, ignored all the voices in his head that told him this was wrong, he shouldn’t feel this way about his best friend, about a man. How could it be wrong to love someone so purely, so wholeheartedly? 

His hand moved towards Abed’s face as if in slow-motion, stopped just before touching him. He tucked the loose strand of hair back, unaware of how he was holding his breath until it burst out of him in a quiet gasp as he allowed his fingers to linger on Abed’s cheek, just barely grazing his soft skin.

How could this be wrong, he wondered again, as a blissful warmth pervaded him, as if the rays of sun had seeped into his skin. But no, this wasn’t the sun; the sun wasn’t half as bright as Abed was, had never brightened Troy’s world quite as much.

Abed shifted slightly in his sleep, and Troy let him settle into his arms, let him nuzzle into the crook of his neck, let himself wish he could have this while they were both awake. 

In the safety of their blanket fort, he let his fears slip away, and let the warmth take over for only a moment. He let his fingers tangle in Abed’s hair, let his other hand place itself on top of Abed’s own. He let his eyes close, let his breaths deepen and slow, and as he drifted back to sleep, he let the words he was always struggling to keep unsaid, slip out.

_I love you._

**Author's Note:**

> So... yeah. Yearning. If you liked this, please leave some kudos and/or a comment, it fills my heart with joy every time.


End file.
